Monday, January 11, 2021

Before You Go


 Was never the right time, whenever you called

Went little, by little, by little until there was nothing at all
Our every moment, I start to replay
But all I can think about is seeing that look on your face
When you hurt under the surface
Like troubled water running cold
Well, time can heal but this won't
So, before you go
Was there something I could've said
To make your heart beat better?
If only I'd have known you had a storm to weather

Wednesday, January 06, 2021

January Brought Me Back to Imlek Morning in 2017

Never have I ever imagine that I would ask for blood donor due to any emergency situation. Well because who wants to have an emergency? Nobody. 

Today, my grandmother is being treated in the ICU and need plasma convalescent donor from B+ blood. It was very hard to find the right donor because until now there’s still no one that suits the criteria for plasma convalescent donor. 

Some strangers, who got my announcement, showed up and show their big heart to help giving their blood. This reminds me of one moment back in 2017.

It was on January 28, 2017, 01:00 AM, Tidar (my XLFL facilitator) sent a message in our Line group asking if anyone still awake and willing to help. I was still awake that morning because I just got home from a rehearsal session for Imlek fashion show. I thought if I can help, then why not? Maybe there’s a good reason why God gave me this situation. Maybe this is why the rehearsal session took a very long time until midnight. 

Long story short Tidar emailed me and the other XLFL students the next morning and here is what it says.

Subject: A Note on Imlek Morning

Hi arek Suroboyo -

Ingat Line chat saya jam 1 pagi semalam menanyakan siapa yang masih terbangun? Yes, it was an emergency situation. 

Here's the backstory:
Danial (12 tahun) adalah seorang anak asal Bawean yang bersekolah di Surabaya. Long story short, tadi pagi ia harus operasi usus buntu tetapi tidak ada yang menemani karena dia merantau seorang diri di Surabaya.

Dibutuhkan paling tidak satu orang dewasa untuk menemani selama Danial operasi. Setelah tanya kanan-kiri, akhirnya Rara came to the rescue dan bisa menemani Danial. Rara datang ke Rumah Sakit Bedah Surabaya di Manyar sejak jam 5 pagi sampai jam 10 ini. Operasi langsung dilakukan jam 6 pagi.

Rara spent very many hours this morning with a total stranger. A kid she doesn't know before. She was waiting patiently and making sure Danial is fine. Apa yang Rara lakukan pagi ini adalah sebuah pertunjukan yang bagi saya sangat indah. Pertunjukan itu bukan di runway fashion - yang selama ini Rara lakukan, tetapi di sebuah rumah sakit.

Dear Rara, it must be so difficult to stay awake in a hospital at very early. I just wished God gave you the best and I pray you continue to grow as the remarkable woman you have become today. Thanks for showing us your big heart.

Sidenote: My highest appreciation also goes to Anthony who is actually willing to take care of Danial this morning. But then I forgot, today's Imlek. It's the time of the year to spend time with dearest family. And Anthony deserves to meet his family. So thank you Anthony, Happy Imlek! 😊

Your proud facilitator/friend/fan of you all.

Tidar Rachmadi


This story make me realize that I am actually not bad as a human. I still have empathy (or I don’t know what this is called) deep down in my heart. And in the time like this I see there are a lot of people who actually care to others, and willing to help even if I am a total stranger to them.

I thank God for everything that happen to me, whether it was good or bad, it will lead me to something better :’)

Sunday, May 03, 2020

My Personal Andes: XL Future Leaders Surabaya Class Batch 3

Social Impact Project Final Pitch

The Whole Class (Surabaya)

Best Support System

We've been through a lot. And here we are, graduating together, our ties to one another grew stronger every day.

Sunday, April 19, 2020

Life After Covid19 Pandemic

Unlike the usual Sunday, today I woke up early. Managed to clean the house and finish house chores at 9 AM somehow feels good. Turns out waking up early in the morning can change how everything else goes the whole day. While washing my clothes I heard Deka's live session in his friend's Instagram account discussing about 'The Great Lock-down'. The session was insightful. That made me thought about how life will be after Corona pandemic? Will we all change the way we live? and some also have thoughts that this pandemic is a way out from globalization. 

I am planning to go to the Netherland this December with my Aunt and she said that if by September the situation gets better, we don't need to reschedule. Then I asked how is the current situation there? Is the new number of case still rise or is it decreasing already? And how about the mortality rate? is it also increasing or decreasing already? She said the trend is getting better now. New confirmed case decreased and mortality rate followed the trend. The government will end lock-down in May, yet social distancing keeps going on. People will have to live their life with social distance principles.

Not only in Holland, I think all of the other Countries including Indonesia will also be that way. We will change the way we live. We will reduce social activities in the sake of public health. Because as Deka said in his IG live session, we are facing 2 big problems at the same time now. Public health and economic crisis. Of those two big issues, one that need to be solved first is definitely the health issue.

Sunday, February 10, 2019

When in Ciwidey







One Team. One Dream. It's Time!

Wednesday, February 06, 2019

When you grow up...

"Ga jadi daftar beasiswa tahun ini?"
"Engga.."
"Loh kenapa?! Mundur lagi. Mundur mundur terus."
"Banyak hal-hal tak terduga ternyata." 
"Sayang ih padahal kan pas kalo daftar tahun ini juga baru berangkatnya tahun depan."
"Iya.. gapapa..." 
When you grow up.. life is not always about you and your ambition. It's about your parents.. who are also growing older. They who gave 2/3 of their life taking care of you, feeding you, buying you useless toys, paying your school, thinking about your future. They who worked day and night to make you happy, to see your smile blooming in your face. How could you not thank them by giving love as big as what they have for you?

It's about your sibling whose body immune were not as strong as yours cause you were born too fast, consuming all the nutrition he needed to build a strong immune system. He's so fragile that he can suddenly be in a hospital needed extra treatment from the doctor. How could you sit still doing nothing? There's no way I'll still prioritize myself in this condition. I'll put my family first and leave my ambition for a while.

But as Martin Luther King Jr. once said in his speech "I say to you today, my friends, though, even though we face the difficulties of today and tomorrow, I still have a dream."